Married Life 2

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After completing his examination, the doctor took her husband aside. "I don’t like the looks of your wife at all."
"Me neither, Doc." Said the husband. "But she’s a good cook and the kids seem to like her."

Wife - Honey, there is a man at the door, said you are his close relative and he can prove it.
Husband - He must be a complete idiot.
Wife - True, but I think he has other proof.

The 50-ish wife comes up to her husband and says, 'So, Harvey. What do you think of my new bra-less look? Does it make me look younger?'
'It does!' Harvey says. 'It pulls all the wrinkles out of your face!'

Hubby - You always carry my photo in your handbag to the office. Why?
Wife - When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at your picture and the problem disappears.
Hubby - You see, how miraculous and powerful I am for you?
Wife - Yes, I see your picture and say to myself, 'What other problem can there be greater than this one?'

There was once a wife so jealous that when her husband came home one night and she couldn't find hairs on his jackets she yelled at him, "Great, so now you're cheating on me with a bald woman!"
The next night, when she didn't smell any perfume, she yelled again by saying, "She's not only bald, but she's too cheap to buy any perfume!"

A friend asks another about his secret for such a long and successful marriage.
The friend answers, "We take the time to go to a restaurant two times a week for a nice candlelight dinner with soft music and enjoy a slow walk home. The Mrs. goes Tuesdays; I get Fridays."

Jill tells her husband, "Jack, that young couple that just moved in next door seem such a loving twosome. Every morning, when he leaves the house, he kisses her goodbye, and every evening when he comes homes, he brings her a dozen roses. Now, why can't you do that?"
"Gosh," Jack answers, "why, I hardly know the girl."
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